How Moms can find time for themselves and where to start

As moms, we never seem to have time and there are many reasons why.

Some reasons are self-inflicted like mom guilt or worry that can build up into anxiety and depression. Other times there are external reasons like work, family, extended family care, spinning multiple plates, or just life in general.

We all lead hectic lives, so taking a 10-minute break for ourselves is almost next to impossible. With ten minutes, you can do the laundry, pack away toys, figure out dinner or whatever other chores that needs to get done.

A favorite quote of mine is ‘We all have 24 hours in a day it’s how you use it’. I’m always checking to make sure I’m in tune and using it wisely. But in order to figure out our 24 hours and our life, a self-assessment is key.

Where is your time going? What are the things you want to do, that you don’t seem to have time for? It’s so easy to just let our lives take us along for the ride, as we follow our schedules and bounce from one thing to the next. Mothers tend to go wherever we’re needed, and that’s toward external pulls. What about our internal needs? How do we learn to listen to them more? What if, instead of letting our schedules rule us, we took charge of our own schedule? Let’s talk about how to *fix* your schedule and make sure you’re about to find time to have the 24-hours that you desire, and the life you truly want.

Step 1: Write out your schedule, and what actually happens from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed. Where is your time going?

Step 2: Write down the things you want to “find time” for.

Step 3: Analyze your schedule and be honest with yourself about where you can fit in more of those things you want to do. Chances are, you won’t be able to fit in all of them, but even some of them will increase your quality of life tenfold.

Let’s do this

SAMPLE SCHEDULE / SELF-ASSESSMENT

Hi, there! I’m Taylor, and I work part-time for CODDLE as a writer, designer, PR assistant, etc. I work from home doing various social media jobs, and have two small children. If anyone has ever *not had time* it’s me. But, I’ve found that the more I tell myself that I don’t have time, the less time I have.

When Ruth, CODDLE’s CEO and Founder, brought this blog post to my attention, it really seemed to hit home. We do all have 24 hours in a day. Where are my hours going? While I feel like I’m running a marathon from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep, I know that I’m missing some key self-care opportunities somewhere in there. There has to be more to life than working and feeding children, right? Where is the time I need for exercise, cleaning the house, cooking actual meals for myself, etc.? I have a feeling that the time is actually there, but I’m just not seeing it, or I’m not taking the right opportunities. Let’s take a look at my schedule: what actually happens, and if there was a missed opportunity for self-care (or not!)

8:00am - Wakeup

The kids typically wake up between 7:30 and 8am, unless our 7-month-old has had a bad night, and he wakes up maybe an hour earlier. Our 3 year-old is pretty consistent with this 8am wakeup time.

Immediately after waking up, we move to the kitchen to make breakfast. We typically eat, then get dressed for the day and are out the door by 9am. It’s very fast-paced, and that hour disappears quickly.

Is there room for self-care?

I feel like there isn’t in the mornings. I know some mothers set an alarm or choose to wake up before their kids to enjoy quiet time, a cup of tea, etc. While that might work for some, it’s not my personality. I’ve always been big on sleep and feel like that’s the best form of self-care I can give myself - so I like to get as much as I can! Having a baby really adds to that need, for sure.

9:00am - Walk the kids to their nanny’s house

The boys both go to their nanny’s house during the day while my husband and I work. Our nanny lives about 2 blocks away, so we typically walk them over in a jogging stroller.