The Motherhood Assumption
At some point we all make false assumptions about motherhood. Even before you became a mother, you had a fixed assumption of what your version of motherhood would be like. You may have fantasized about how cute and perfectly your kids would be, and you make promises to yourself on how to make motherhood a walk in the park.
Obviously, if you're a mom you know this is so far from it. Just like assumptions about Work-From-Home-Mom (WFHM), Stay-At-Home-Mom (SAHM), and Work-Outside-The-Home-Mom (WOTHM). They cause more harm than good especially to a new mom trying to figure out the world she has just created for herself. Instead, we should spend time talking with other moms we know to hear their perspective what's the real deal. What works and what doesn’t work. It wouldn’t hurt to get single women, moms and veteran moms together to facilitate a little self-education. There’s nothing like perspective to de-bunk all these so-called assumptions.
Here's the four outrageously false assumptions I hear a lot about motherhood.
You no longer need friends
When you are a mom; most assume you’ve become a social pariah and don’t need friends.
Lets say it in unison, moms needs friends. Who else will you tell all your problems to aside from your spouse or partner? Motherhood is stressful, friends take the edge off. You just want someone to shake their head in agreement every time while you talk.
And...so you know...your kids don’t count as your friends no matter how many hours your spend alone with them. Join a mom support group, hang out with moms especially if there're at the same stage as you; make your play date a mom date as well. Everyone needs friends; moms need them too.
Moms needs friends
You don’t have time
I think motherhood and limited time go hand in hand. You have kids to tend to; changing diapers, feeding, burping, so when is their time to do other things like chase your dream or have a hobby.
Moms, need to create time to unwind. We’re creatures of creativity - moms make the best CEO. And if we’re great at that, finding time for our hobbies and dreams is a walk in the park. Find the time, make the time take on some hobbies or ‘Netflix and Chill’.
We’re creatures of creativity - moms make the best CEO
Self-care takes a lot of time
To think that self-care takes time is the biggest false assumption. We all need it and it can be scheduled in a way that doesn’t take a chunk of your time at all.
So how do you do it? Calendar almost everything, look for gaps or make gaps pick out hours in the week and schedule something that interest you. Dream big then start small!
Self care for moms = dream big start small
Once you have kids your life is over
This one is total BS! There are so many moms out their handling there business, if anything life is just beginning. Motherhood creates a new aspect of your life, a new twist kids shouldn’t consume you. You can be what you want to be and a mom, do what you want to do and still be a loving mom. Take time out, have a dance party if you want to. Life is on your terms, pursue your dream. Eventually you’ll realize your kids are a part of the life you are building.
What other assumptions have you heard? Shoot me a reply below in comments.