How to Thrive as a Single Mom
As a single mom, heck as a moms it’s easy to forget you exists. Societal standard, says it's the kids first then maybe us.
I think its this crazy standard why we feel guilty to even take time for ourselves. I've tried doing stuff when I'm exhausted and its a no go. You know I'm exhausted, I start talking in a high pitched tone. My daughter feeling the tension will ask "mommy why are you mad?" When I hear that I know I'm at my wits end. We have to take care of ourselves and other the appendages of life. It shouldn't happen at the point where its the only option we have left. Single Moms I'm here for you. We'll figure it out together.
You can’t pour from an empty cup. You must fill your cup first.
I think the key is to develop a routine or your process that is manageable and easy to stick with. Pick what's convenient and very easy to indulge in and work with that.
Here's a list of tips I've put together for you to consider.
1. Have a support system
Married or single you can’t go it alone. You need a support system, whether it’s family, friends, nanny, high school or college age babysitter. Whatever form your support comes in make sure you have one. It’s one of the key ways to make sure you can take a break, shutting yourself away in the bathroom for some 'me-time' counts. -:)
2. Take a Stay-cation
Motherhood and exhaustion definitely go hand in hand, Single Mom exhaustion is on another level. If a vacation is far fetched, a stay-cation versus a full fledged vacation might work best. Enjoy a day in your city, visit the museum, city attractions, sit in the park and people watch. Spend a day locally. Work with what you've got, no need for elaborate planning. With work, life and kids, we sometimes never enjoy the city or town we live in. Except when family or friends come to town.
3. Treat yourself to dinner
You don’t need a date to have dinner. Get the kids off to bed then order yourself something you've always wanted to try top it off with champagne or wine. Or schedule dinner out, Netflix and Chill works too. You’re a Mom, you deserve EVERYTHING.
4. Learn something new
Kill your curiosity by learning something new. Find the time, plan the time, make the time. You can also involve your kids and make it fun for them as well. Remember as they get older it means more independence. Start teaching it early, so they are okay with being in a room or a space by themselves.
5. Smile and do it a lot
You might be crying half of the time - the struggle is definitely real....but think of one thing in your life you're grateful for and SMILE. Enough said :-)
6. Nothingness wouldn’t hurt
Doing nothing for a few minutes or hours is a great way to calm your thoughts. Take a nap, sit in your car for fifteen minutes before going inside your house. Do nothing once in a while.
7. Indulge in your favorite guilty pleasures
We all have guilty pleasures. It does't suddenly disappear now you're a mom. You still got it gurrrrl, just indulge in yours. :-)
8. Create boundaries
Learn to say no to others without explaining yourself. That's it...I'm not even explaining..!
Single Mom life is hard AF, you don't need anyone's permission to show yourself love.
Single, married whatever the deal. Is there something you do just for you? I'd love to hear it, share in the comments.